Ever since my perfect wedding day came and went on April 7, 2017, and Mark and I touched back home after nine incredible days in paradise (otherwise known as Maui, Hawaii), I’ve been struggling to get back in the fitness game. If you follow my efforts on Elite Daily, you probably know I’ve tried a lot of different programs this year based on what sort of moves celebrities swear by, and that has definitely kept my body moving — challenged, even — but aside from the experiments I’ve been assigned, my motivation to be anywhere near as active as I was when the goal was to #sweatforthedress, has plummeted.
Honestly, part of the reason I’ve fallen off the bandwagon is because I work from home now. When I was commuting to and from Manhattan five days a week, I opted to walk 50 blocks a day instead of paying an extra $150 on top of the $400 I was already shelling out to public transportation every month. Subconsciously, I was training my body for athleticism first thing each morning, and again once my nine to five shift came and went. These days, my commute is from the bedroom to the kitchen table, so there I go, erasing a massive chunk of cardio that played a significant role in the chiseling of my physique for two years.
Without that stretch of sidewalk from Penn Station to the Hearst Tower forcing me to get my blood moving at least twice a day, the only thing I really had to rely on was self-motivation, which, for some reason, was severely lacking. Which, by the way, isn’t like me at all. Before, I’d dedicated a combination of at least three to four gym sessions on top of my daily cardio. These days, it can be really difficult to push myself out of bed before 7:45 a.m., which is usually about the time I make a cup of tea, brush my teeth, get dressed, and make breakfast before sitting down to work my seven-hour shift. So what happened?
I can only speak for myself, but being home, instead of waking up early to head into the office, is so incredibly comfortable. At least when I was getting out of the house everyday for work, I already had that motivation to keep going: to get up, walk, work, walk some more, get home, change, and head to the gym. It was a constant flow of stamina. Now when I finish work, I’m already feet away from my couch.
The easy thing to do would be to crawl into the corner of our sectional and watch hours of T.V. until bed. Of course there have been days like this, but there have been plenty of others where I’ve dedicated time to my yoga practice, to weight lifting, to trying new programs, revisiting old programs. Then one of my favorite YouTube vloggers, Sarah’s Day, released her 8-week Sweat It To Shred It workout routine, and I was ready to get back into it.
Sweat It To Shred It is unlike any program I’ve tried before because it’s focused on body weight, and body weight alone. I became passionate about weight lifting from the get-go when I joined Planet Fitness back in 2013 and started following Ben Williamson’s Crush 60. I lost 15 pounds all through weight lifting and light cardio; I thought bodyweight training would bore me. But Sarah has uploaded a few of her at-home workouts to Youtube before, and giving them a try, I realized body weight would actually challenge me in a way dumbbells and barbells never could. So I made the big purchase (it wasn’t cheap - $42 on sale, originally about $65), and made the commitment. But before I start, I was prompted to answer a few questions about how I currently felt towards my body, my fitness journey, and the goals I was looking to achieve.
To kick off the fitness section of my blog, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to answer Sarah’s questions and document my progress throughout the eight weeks. I’ll check in at the halfway point, and once more when I’ve finished the entire program.
How do I feel about my current fitness level?
My current fitness level is decent. I know I’m strong, and I can be a fast runner when I want to be. I also recognize, though, that I have fallen off the bandwagon/ My fitness level is not nearly what it was just one year ago. Last June, my torso was leaner, my arms, back, and leg muscles were much more defined. And now, not only can I feel a difference, I see a physical one. I miss that amazing confidence, and the strength.
How do I feel about my body?
My relationship with my body is one gigantic rollercoaster, polished off with all the bells and whistles - flips, escalations, stomach-wrenching drops, and backwards motions. There’s highs and lows, but that’s always how it’s been really. This year, though, I went from feeling fit and slim to semi-fit, still small, but some days I feel more lean than others, and the confidence comes and goes. I make it sound romantic, but that’s really not my intention. It just is what it is.
Unlike when I was in the thick of my eating disorder, I can honestly say I don’t hate my body. I don’t hate the way I look, but I know I want to improve.
What are my fitness/body goals for the next 4 weeks?
My fitness goals for the next 4 weeks are to (hopefully) fall back in love with the process again. I want to show up, and give my all to every workout I do, work hard, sweat harder, and to feel proud of myself for making the effort.
What do I love about my body?
What an interesting question, seeing as how the relationship status between me and my body has just gone from it’s complicated to in a relationship at all. It’s like, I’m in that awkward, yet fun stage of getting to know my body and all its quirks and appreciating them for what they are instead of tantalizing them.
What do I love about my body? Love is a strong word, but if I really think hard, I guess I would say that I love my eyes and smile. I love my thighs and decolletage. I love my body’s abilities. I love the fact that when I’m sick, it can heal, and that when I challenge it, my muscles rise up to the occasion. I love it’s potential. I love my potential.
Let’s see what I’ve got.